Introduction

The Kindly One book cover

Dissipation and Despair is the sequel to the popular fan fiction novel, Lust Over Pendle, by A.J. Hall. You may wish to read Lust Over Pendle before reading this e-book. Indeed Dissipation and Despair is one in a series of HP fanfic and cross-over fanfic e-books by the author A.J. Hall. So you might like to refer to their suggested reading order or review the other e-books by A.J. Hall, before reading Dissipation and Despair.


After offending his Bishop, the Rev. Peter Blakeney had feared he would be stuck for the rest of his career in rough inner city curacies. Even though his letter of appointment bore an anonymous scrawl "Best of British luck", the surprise offer of the incumbency of St Sebastian's Church, Malfoy Intrinsica, Wiltshire seemed like the promise of a rural idyll. And though the foot and mouth epidemic was in full swing, there were sinister carvings behind the choir stalls and all the locals changed the subject immediately if he even mentioned the Manor up the hill (let alone its reclusive Lord) he felt he was settling in well. Until one night there came a tap at his study window, and he found himself caught between two worlds, and about to find out exactly why St Sebastian is the patron saint of archers, enemies of religion, gardeners, murrains of cattle, plagues and police. It is a cosy English village whodunit in the classic tradition, give or take an Unforgivable curse or so.

In the best traditions of the Golden Age detective novel, a map of the village of Malfoy Intrinsica and floor plans to Malfoy manor are provided.

You should note that this novel is set during February and March 2001.

Disclaimer

This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. This e-book is rated R (American rating) and 15 (UK rating).

Warnings

  • Vegetarians may be offended by the black pudding incident.
  • Teetotallers are reminded that this fanfic contains numerous scenes set in the local pub.
  • The fic contains references to illegal drug taking for recreational purposes.
  • Atheists are warned that the local vicar is presented in a favourable light.
  • Catholics may be disturbed to learn that he is contemplating committing monogamy.
  • Mary-Sue haters are advised that he is an OC.
  • Those who are anxious that respect for authority be reinforced in fiction are warned that he is in conflict with his Bishop.
  • Presbyterians are advised that there is a Bishop.
  • Other religious groups are asked to note that this fic does not contain equal airtime for their own theological standpoints.
  • Bogomils may be distressed by the Bogomil/bugger pun in the fifth chapter.
  • Eco-warriors may find the gratuitous deployment of a Porsche 996 distressing...also the metaphor which refers to harpooning whales.
  • Dog haters; the spaniels are back.
  • Cat haters; Crookshanks appears for the first time.
  • Epidemiologists should note that the incubation time of Pasteurella pestis in the human body has been deliberately played about with for plot purposes.
  • There is an unfavourable reference to Mussolini, which Fascists may find offensive.
  • This book may contain traces of nuts.
  • There are references to rolls and Jammie dodgers, which those following the Atkins diet may prefer to avoid.

Oh, and the boys are still at it like rabbits.

Acknowledgements

As ever, I am indebted to my betas, Erica and Jennifer. On matters of religious doctrine and the practices of the Church of England I am also indebted to Alan, who gave me the benefit of his experience as a Rector in a country parish, and for additional input both on the Church of England and on arcane points of archaeology and the proper way to deal with bones, I am also indebted to Pam.

Alec drew the superb maps and floor plans, and assisted me in devising and fleshing out the history of the Malfoy family.

As usual, Russ from shoes for industry designed the book cover, produced the e-books and compiled this on-line work.

The opinions, prejudices, faults and spelling herein are all my own work, and I apologise in advance for them.

A.J. Hall